GROWING UP WITH MY MOM AND DAD

Mom, Dad, and Vito makes three (somewhere around 1949)

To this day, I still find myself, occasionally thinking about growing up during the 40's and 50's comparing to what I am seeing today. My mom was a stay at home mom as were most mom's. She spent her day's doing mom things, cooking, cleaning, sewing, talking on the phone and dressing her little guy (me) in white short pants, clean shirt each day and newly polished shoes. To take it another step back, I believe my underwear was pressed after each washing along with my socks. She even pressed my dad's underwear. "You never know what will happen" she would say. "You could get in an accident and I don't want people seeing you with dirty or unpressed underwear." Even the sheets were pressed before being put on the bed.....WHY??? They just got wrinkled as soon as you touched them. The funniest thing though was that everything in our house was covered in plastic from lampshades to furniture. One would find yourself slipping off the living room furniture in the winter because it was so cold and sticking to it in the summer because of the heat. Apparently the plastic was so good for inside the house that we even had it in the car. It brought out the color of the upholstery better.......HUH??........ If I recall......... even at the age of 29 and the night before my wedding, my mom pressed my underwear.

Growing up in the Rizzo household was fantastic. Just the three of us and happiness. I did get my share of punishment, never in the sense of spankings or such, but sent to my room without supper, until at least time that dinner was on the table........or ..........better yet. "Wait until you father comes home"......boy, how many times did I hear that one. I was thoroughly kept off balance with their interpretation of good cop, bad cop. Neither one wanted to be the bad cop, so I could never tell who it was going to be, even when it was happening. Anyway, we always sat down at dinner time together even when I was in high school. Five o'clock was dinner. If I was not home at that time you better eat out, because there was nothing left for me. Also I had better have a damn good excuse, per dad's instruction. If your at school for some reason, I want a note from them. His idea being, that if he or mom had to write a note giving the school a reason for me being late, or absent then he wanted the same from them for me missing dinner. The only time I remember my parents going to anything at school, was either they were asked by a teacher to review my progress or lack of,..........which, surprisingly was only once, or at the end of year parents night...... when all of your exceptional work was put on the bulletin board and shown to all parents. They would meet your teacher at that time and of course they would always be told how lucky she/he was to have such a gifted child such as (place your name here) in her/his class............YAH, RIGHT!!!! .......then explain why you did nothing but complain all year long that having me in your class gave you (the teacher) an automatic pass to heaven, since this time, with me,was like being in ................HELL!!.....

I still remember some of the stories my dad would tell me about when he went to school. They had something called a spanking machine.....and a truant officer. If you were caught missing school without a written excuse from your parents that someone from the Principals office called a truant officer would call and check your whereabouts with whoever answered the phone. If it was felt that there was a surprise tone in that persons voice, they would send out a APB (all points bulletin) to search you down. When they found you, they would bring you to the truant officer office ,tie you face down on this spanking machine, start up the motor, and this long wooden blade would locate you butt for 5 spanks.......1st offense. Don't get caught a second time. This story was reputed in my freshman year when a group of us guys searched out this machine and found ........NUTHIN!!!!!.........

Both my parents were extravert's, they could both talk about many things and would even believe what they were saying themselves..........at the time they were saying it........ Gift of gab, yes it was. My dad was a real funny guy. Everything that would ever go wrong was blamed on one particular group.........the COMMUNISTS.......rain today, ITS THE DAMN COMMUNISTS........snow today ITS THE DAMN COMMUNISTS........loose bowel movements......ITS THE DAMN COMMUNISTS............splinter in your finger............need a haircut.........to much butter on your sandwich..........ITS THE DAMN COMMUNISTS. It wasn't until many, many years later that I think I have found evidence of where this came from. I found amongst his fondest belongings that he was a card carrying republican block captain. Now, I know where all my republican blaming name calling comes from................the 50's.

Another thing I remember about my dad from the 50's. Every night and I mean every night after dinner he would take about 15 minutes to finish his glass of beer from dinner...........and then.............TV TIME!!!!!. My dad had his chair center stage just the right distance from our set.......lights totally out.....for better viewing, TV program from the Sunday paper tucked into the chair clicker at his side..........(mom)....... she was the official channel changer and antenna rabbit ears adjuster. Later, in life, when he got my uncle to go up on the roof to put up an antenna on the chimney, my mom was relieved of that duty. I think it was then she started to forget things . He had the nights programs pre-selected from his newspaper, would discuss the week's programming plan with mom and had notes next to each program. Number one on his nightly shows was professional wrestling. He swore this was real and would sit in his chair and really crack up over the like of Gorgeous George, Antonnino Rocco, the barefooted Italian, and the Masked Marvel and if his guy was loosing I could visualize dad getting up out of his chair, reaching into the TV and literally pull the other wrestler off him but some of his favorites were the woman wrestlers and the midget wrestlers. Next, were old cowboy films......Hopalong Cassidy, Gene Autry and Roy Rogers..........dad........whatever made you happy.............because at 9:00 he was usually asleep in his chair or on his way up to bed. Five AM comes early.

ALMOST FORGOT...........MY NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION

Damn, February 21st already and I almost forgot about my New Year's resolution. How embarrassing. Guess I better get to work on it before this year gets the better of me and I just have to carry it over to next year. First thing is I need some kind of a plan.


Was it the garage cleaning or washing my face each day? AH! what the hell, I already washed my face today, better check out the garage cleaning.


Well, I have the plan now so......................................



2/22 0800 up and at tum. Get my coffee going and bring it out to the garage to look over the things to be done.



0830 first thing, get the cars out of the garage and onto the driveway.



0845 coffee finished, better get another cup



0900 back out to the garage and I think I will start over at the workbench. Thing to do here is separate all these little cans of nuts, bolts, nails etc into cans of their own for easy locating in the future. Throw out the bent nails and screws etc.



1000 well, that's done.....next is to move some of this old lumber outside into the trash pile



1030 OH! there's the mailman, better get the mail. "Hi, Steve, how u doin today"



1100 well, now that talking with Steve is over better get the mail inside. "Hi Kay, how are you today, how's the family" "picking up your mail, just a minute I'll get it for you"



1145 she's a nice lady, now, where's that mail, oh! here on the trunk of the car. I'll just get it inside.



1147 "got the mail, Margot, I see lunch is ready. I'll just have lunch now and continue my garage cleaning after"


1245 now that lunch is finished, let me just check the news on TV.



1315 OK, just want to close my eyes for 15 minutes



1500 that was a nice little nap. Think I will just go up to the barber and get a trim.



"Margot, why are the garage doors open and the cars in the driveway" " I started to do what" well it's to late to continue now, guess it can wait for another day.


------------another day-------------------



well now, where did I leave off in getting this garage shaped up ? OK, I remember. OH! here comes the mailman. "Hi Steve, how u doin?" what? almost lunch time already?



************************************************************************************

Sometimes, I feel myself wondering off mentally. Margot calls it day dreaming. I call it getting my thoughts together. I find that asking myself questions just induces the brain to start working. Guess the only thing left now is to get the correct answers. Just wondering if it's only me or have you found yourself asking questions on matters that really don't mean anything. I started to think one day about the weirdest of topics.

Do birds close their eyes when they sleep?

If birds find a worm that they don't like the taste of, do they spit it out?

When bears begin to hibernate in the winter, do they wake up if they have to go to the bathroom, or do they just do it while they hibernate? Who cleans up the mess in the spring?

Why does a white chicken lay a brown egg?

Why are cowboys called cowboys? I never saw them ride a cow.

Border Collies are known for herding, why then don't we just call them Herding Collies?

If a hair stylist styles hair why do we call a hair cutter a barber?

Now, I am sure that there are so many questions left in life to be answered. Why is life so complicated?

PEOPLE WATCHING...........101......

I don't know if one really knows or understands good PEOPLE WATCHING....or the techniques of it but I consider myself one of a kind.....if not the best in this category. People watching.....unlike.....stalking, is an art in itself. Not only must you find the perfect people watching spot but you must do it unsuspectingly. This is something that I found could be done when one is in a group or when you find yourself alone but the technique is very important. It can be done if you are single, it can be done if you are "spoken for" or it can be if you are married.....in the case of the latter.....decorum along with self respect, self ego and discrimination.................and WITHOUT YOUR WIFE noticing... must prevail. I also find that one must tell (through your eyes ONLY) not only the people you are watching, but also the people that you are watching with, that you are watching them and that you are watching with them since this brings out the true meaning of PEOPLE WATCHING. With that understanding, which I presume you do understand,....................... (if not reread).........one begins to "People Watching"




Places to People Watch are very important.......depending on what you expect to see and I speak only from a man's point of view..............since I am a man............I wanted to collaborate with a woman's point of view...........however Margot forbid that, since some travelling was necessary to do the proper research with my 28 year old collaborator.


The Beach......... this is the ultimate, especially if you are middle aged heading towards OLD. Also, it gives one OLD person the happiness of .......trying..........to be young.......again. (without all that cosmetic surgery......and stuff.)

Casino's are the second best place because of the variety of people to choose from.


For the young------


You could stand ankle deep in the surf, hands on your hips, hat slightly pulled down over your eyes an occasionally quarter turn to get other looks. This position is suggested only if one has a sculptured tan body, dark or blonde wavy hair, cut slightly over the ears. Also, very important is the type of swimsuit one wears. This person should have the swimming champion jockey type. By taking the slow quarter turns, THIS not only encourages even tanning but also and overview shot of looking for the perfect ..........PEOPLE WATCHING specimen.




For the middle aged, sitting legs crossed, either reading the wall street journal or a very thick book or perhaps doing the New York Times crossword puzzle. This gives the suspicion of being somewhat of an intellect or investor, encouraging the better of the opposite sex to make sure they pass by. Possibly slightly graying hair helps. Wear yellow tinted night vision lens on your glasses, showing that you have excitement for early evening activities. Occasionally lift you head away from whatever your reading, look around as if to be looking for a word, to complete your crossword puzzle or unsuspectingly stare into space scoping out the scenery.







For the OLD, you should be sitting propped up on a legless, beach chair.......for stability..... dark glasses to prevent anyone from seeing who you are looking at, trunk type swim suit loosely tied so you could breath, your paper or book opened and resting on you inflated stomach, knees bent and feet buried in the sand, to prevent people seeing your fungus toenails or misshaped toes. Hands behind your head to give the impression of pure relaxation.........it also will help force the stomach northward towards the chest area.................. and..........most importantly..... prevents your head from falling ,when you accidentally doze off..............
pick out anyone younger than you with either a bikini or two piece suit and visualize yourself being that young dude you once were standing ankle deep in the surf.

In this age bracket it also does not hurt................to wear a lot of gold chains, to help blend with the graying chest hairs. What ever you do --------DON'T STAND UP..........first of all the quick movement to the UP position might encourage dizziness and you fall over or your stomach falling towards your toes might do the same.





I have found that people watching can be done any time of the day, anywhere one might be, and the best part it's free........ now, take it one step further. For a few bucks one might find it very indulging to be holding a glass of wine, a latte, cappuccino at the same time that they are enjoying the antics of people going by. People astonish me, they come in all sizes, colors and dress just to mention a few but no matter what their difference appear to be I truly believe their minds are running in different directions. I usually play a little game with myself, while I indulge in the sport of people watching. I try to visualize what they do for a living, what do they do to entertain themselves, what their hobbies are and best of all. WHY ARE THEY ACTING SO STUPID!!!!! Have you ever noticed how young people try to act so OLD and OLD people try to act so young.



I ask myself from time to time..........self.............where do I really enjoy watching people? Some of my favorite places are, shopping malls, casino's, sporting events, resort area's..........or anyplace sitting down..............however.....saying that I admit, I people watch just sitting in front of my TV. I still consider people watching looking across the dinner table at Margot. Why does she eat her vegetables before her meat, why does she chew her bread that way and why does she put butter only on certain kinds of bread and not others? Why is she wearing THAT sweater? What is she thinking now? OOOPPPPS............sorry, everything has a habit of coming back to................ME!!!! and what I WANT!!!!!!




I must tell you a story. Several years ago, 5 of us decided to drive around Europe taking in the sites. Three ladies, two men. We had reached Siena, a nice size town in the Tuscany area of Italy. The three ladies decided to go shopping and left myself and the other OLD DUDE.... basking in the sun of the city center square. A perfect place to sit with our wine and PEOPLE WATCH. Now... we decided to play the role, sssooo there we sat. our sweaters hung around our shoulders loosely tied in a single loop, our reading glasses (with tinted lens) perched on top of our head, an Italian newspaper resting on the small table and the two of us enjoying the views and the people, especially the younger ladies in leather tight pants or very short shirts scooting around town on their little vespers (motor scooter). We decided to speak with our hands following other guys speaking in low tones and smiling sheepishly at all women that passed our table. OOOHHHHH, WHAT A GLORIOUS LIFE!!!!!....... suddenly and to much of our surprise....after three wines, two questions for directions from tourists, we were approached, by three ladies. The ladies seem to be quite forward and knew exactly what they wanted and how much it cost. First thing out of my friends mouth was an Italian phrase " quanta Costa senora " a sweet reply 10,000 Lira senor
As we reached for our wallets, at which point ----- we had to lower our tinted bifocals,........... discovering we had just been approached by .............................OUR WIVES and friend................"can we have 10,000 Lira, we saw these beautiful silk scarves." .................... "whatsa canna you giva me in ..........how you say......... inna return?" BABY.






So, my friends, if your looking to be able to occupy yourself without getting a job, try PEOPLE WATCHING. .......................but remember...........................DO NOT STALK...........









Some might call this perversion or day dreaming.............call it whatever you want..........it's the only fun I have left.

COMMENTS---------LITE

John Edwards



Well, now that John Edwards has broken his silence, and marriage, about fathering a child outside his marriage I guess the republican party will label all democrats as cheaters, liars, God opposing bastards.................but with a very nice expensive haircut.









Emanual



Ron recently was criticised by the republicans, especially self appointed chief female, Sarah Palin, who has called for his removal for calling members of the republican party (reta....) stupid. Now, of course comes the question, If this was a private meeting in a private room with only known private people....................how did the news get out?? do we have another republican Watergate occurring? How many more words will be lost????







Toyota



You are all aware of the recent problems with Toyota Motors. Gas pedals sticking, no brakes. Think very hard about this folks, these recalled Toyota's are mostly built in the NASCAR belt by NASCAR builders. Interviewed recently was Bubba Billy Bowers in which is stated cars poseto go fast and did you ever see stop lights lite up .......they's not pose to have breaks, they's stop when they's out of gas!!!! DUH Nascar's don't need that stuff.








Golf and Tom Harkins



one of golf's senior statesman, recently gave his thoughts on what Tiger Woods should do in the future. According to Harkins, Tiger should come out and admit and accept all blame and tell the world watching golf, that he intends to change his life. Also, Harkins tells of Tigers poor attitude on the golf course, throwing golf clubs and swearing unlike previous champions i.e. Arnold, Gary, Jack and Chi Chi. Guess he also wants Tiger to get mentoring lessons from golf's John Daly.


Republican Leadership

I see that President Obama has invited the Republican leadership to participate in discussions concerning the health reform. They previously have complained that none of their better than the democrats ideas were considered and that everything was done behind closed doors. Now, they seem to be proposing that the existing plan be totally scrapped and start all over. This seems now to be a little over the edge, since most of the plan has been rewritten to put some of their wants into it. Now we waste more time. Seems to me that besides learning only the word NO! if they had their way totally, all democrats would be walking around in animal skins carrying big clubs and speaking like chimpanzee's' . Then again, maybe that puts the liberals on an even keel with them.





Tiger Woods





After being released, from his sex therapy classes, Tiger found out that one of his young ladies wants a full apology from him. He apparently told her during one of "their nights together" that "Yes, my dear you are the only one" "I'm not seeing anyone else" Who the hell did she think Elin was??? ..........now she feels that she was misled...............DUH!!!!!!!



Gambling for Seniors



If you look around different casino's in this country, you will undoubtedly find more OLD people than ever. My question is when does gambling become an addiction. I recently asked that of an OLD person I met at a casino. Her reply " When we are winning........it's entertainment, when we are losing............it's addiction" "where do you place yourself" "To me,.....it's therapy........ I'm right in between .............now get out of my way------sonny"................I think you mean HONEY...................................Margot

ARE YOU SMARTER THAN A ...............SQUIRREL?

At the rear of our house, one story above ground and off our family room, we have this slightly oversize deck. During the summer months, this deck becomes Margot's flower haven. Pots and Pots of all colored flowers, but with a theme.

For some years now, Margot has been asking for a bird bath or bird feeder. I personally didn't want a bird feeder so I agreed to have a bird bath. Well, my thought was to wait it out and perhaps Margot would forget all about the birdbath for another year. One day, thought, I looked out from the oversize family room window and low and behold a bright red birdbath set upon the railing of our deck. Birds from all directions coming to swim, splash and do whatever else birds do in this bird bath. I questioned Margot on her choice of birdbaths since I have never seen anything like this in the pet shops or where ever one might buy birdbaths only to be told that it was and oversize Italian lasagna baking dish, but what the hell, the birds really liked it. Now, besides the birds coming over for a dip, we also had "Herman" our adopted squirrel who would , on occasion drop by for a romp or two oh!!! he looked so cute doing the backstroke across this dish.

One day, Margot was trying to convince me to once again think about the purchase of a bird feeder to go along with the birdbath. My goodness Margot, get over it. I don't want some bunch of birds spitting seeds all over the deck and leaving poop on the railings, cant you understand that. After all Margot, I let them come here to wash themselves and to have a little fun in the pool, do we have to have them for breakfast, lunch and dinner every night.

Needless to say, after that stupid question from me, Margot not only won the battle, she won the war.

Several days later, the bird feeder arrived from out of nowhere with a little sign on it. Put me up, Put me up!!!
Well, up it went, and there was no immediate reaction from any of our fine feathered friends. Two days later, 2 birds, and 5 bees visited the bird feeder and like the signal went out far and long, birds from all over started to show up for the Rizzo buffet. All color birds, all size birds and all species of birds----oh! how wonderful to see all of these creatures eating and splashing and eating more......wonder if this could be tax deductible in some way?. Then, the one thing we feared would happen, here comes Herman the squirrel. Fat bushy tail little bastard. Herman was a very sloppy eater, spilling seeds in all directions and leave. He would just hand, literally, around and the birds did not want to get near him. I had to find a way to keep him off this pole. He would just climb up the pole hang on somehow even upside down by spread eagle his hind legs somehow on the curved rungs holding the little cages of seed cakes. How was I going to stop him. OH!!! why not just spray WD40 oil on the pole that would do it. That was fun to watch, the birds would fly off when they saw Herman and he sat for a minute or two and then just make a little jump onto the pole and up he would go ..........but this time he would slowly slide down the pole...........like a fireman down a fire pole. " I cant hold on, he would say" HAHA, I would say back.
It rained that night and the next day brought clear skies and our little bird friends back. Did not see Herman that day, well that's one good sign, guess he gave up.
No my friends, apparently Herman went home to his Herman hut, pulled out his laptop, connected to the ACME store of how to beat the human boobs and got some new ideas. He came back with vengeance in his eyes and determination in his skills. He looked up at the casing holding the seed cakes, looked around, looked back up and SUDDENLY, in one smooth motion leaped from the railing of the deck, to the highest point of the pole, grabbed on, turned himself upside down holding on in a spread eagle position and with his front feet grabbed onto the cake cages and began eating. These cages , by the way, were suppose to be squirrel proof, HA, I say to that. Apparently the rain must have washed away some of the WD40 oil and Herman was able to hold onto the pole. This was his plan for the next several days, while I...........the squirrel hunter.......went to my computer and devised a system to stop him...........finally, I found the solution.
This is where things start to get a little more intense, so I've attached a schematic.

Fig. A-

This is what the bird feeder looks like from the box. Consisted of a round planter (bottom) pole 4' high with 4 spirals, each holding a small chain and cage type holder. Inserted in the cage type holder was a solid (soft) cake made up of all kinds of seeds, berries and whatever else birds like. The birds were able to hold onto the cage and peck away til their hearts content. Dotted line 1 and dotted line 2 each represent how Herman, the flying squirrel would jump and hold onto the shaft.

Fig. B-

I figured that if I could get a flexible type of plastic large enough to detour him from simply climbing the pole and put a hole in the center attach it to the pole, it would force him away from trying to get to the feeder. This worked great for two days. He would shimmy the pole to the plastic, realise that he could not get around this and he simply made off.........empty handed.......so to speak What I did not know, is he simply went back to his squirrel hut, pulled out his computer into the ACME web site and calculated the possibility of being able to jump from the railing to the tip. Now, he had to estimated that part of the triangle. If you follow dotted line 1 and dotted line 2, you will learn, that he had then found the formula to the triangle and was able to leap from the railing to the very top of the bird feeder (4') and be able to balance himself. He would then gather himself, rest a few moments and once again, spread eagle, upside down holding onto the spiraled things, whatever there called and proceed to EAT SOMEONE ELSE'S FOOD..................OK! OK! how about this one.

Fig. C

OK, here's what we know. I know he can climb (shimmy) up the pole. I know he can jump clear to the top of the pole. Now, what happens if he is unable to jump to the top? AAHHH! success. So with the same flimsy plastic that I had placed under the food crates, I will place one on top of the bird feeder. That way, If he happens to jump clear to the top, he will simply not be able to hold onto anything, and will be forced to fall since the plastic is to flexible to hold his weight. Let's give that a try....................Success............for three days. Apparently Herman's' ACME warehouse was one step ahead and Herman's brain was just as ahead. Herman was able to calculate all the scenarios and was able to jump in between the plastic plates and grab onto one of the swinging grated food holders, so he swung a little, big deal. The first time he apparently felt his tail touching something and panic ran through his body.........that soon disappeared.........Herman was able to out dream, out smart everything I had thought of. Only one thing left to do. TAKE ALL THE FOOD HOLDERS AWAY!!!!!! Why didn't I think of that before now. This is why I have now a

FIG. D  (not shown)   reason being I wanted to take it down

Margot would not have this.....UH ! UH ! her play on this was "what's the sense in having a bird feeder if you have nothing on it to feed the birds. but But BUT just think, now we don't have to put up with the crazed squirrel. Margot's mind must just work differently from mine. Why not just let Herman and the birds live together????? says she..........OH!!!! I GUESS YOU MEAN FIR AND FEATHER FLOCK TOGETHER.........UH HUH!!! That.......did not make sense at all...........what kind of women are you???

As I sat and thought about it........maybe, just maybe, she had a point. After all, I did miss the little bird with the yellow head and the little birds that came and went in a bunch, and Herman has been back, climbed the pole, ate a little and than went off for the day somewhere else. What the hell, we'll give that a chance.

SEE YOU IN THE MORNING LITTLE BIRDIES!!!!!!!!

THINK ABOUT IT.............PART 1

Some people have written to me with many comments. Some were things I could write about, things that others recall and thought they should be added to my blog, others wanted to hear my views on a score of different subjects. I intended this blog to be about me, a nobody, growing up and comparing life then, with life now............having said that....... I find myself reminiscing about days gone by,  comparing what I read in newspapers or hear on TV.  Before, I attempt any of these subjects, I once again want to remind you, that I take no specific position on any subject. These are totally my views, my comments as the way I see it going down, so don't even think about writing back with your derogatory comments. They don't interest me as far as this blog is concerned. If you wish to have a serious dialog, there are other ways of doing it.

NOW !!!! Has anyone given any real thought to how our country is being run??? I think not. Lets make an honest attempt to try and understand why we are in the deep doo doo hole we are in and what got us here. I've looked back to when I was a young guy and gave thought to the way my parents did things compared to now-a-days. There was several drastic differences.

When my dad said BUDGET.....he meant BUDGET!!! The first group I will talk about is CONGRESS. We seem to blame all bad things on the President, let's be honest, He/She has nothing to do with the budget except presenting one to........ WHO? ......CONGRESS. but being the CEO of this giant corporation we know as the USA, he (up to now) gets tagged. It's Congress we should concentrate on. Lets start out with the budget. Once again,   the President presents it, but it's congress that approves it. I blame it on the math they use. Back in my days in school, basic math was very simple..........1 +1= 2, 2+2=4 divided by 2=2 multiplied by 2 =4. Very simple you can add, divide (split) multiplied (quick addition) and subtract (take away). This, my friends, is all that is needed to make a budget.

A few weeks ago, I was visiting my grand kids, now 13 yrs old. I found them hard at work doing their math problems. Midway through a problem, one of them got up, goes up stairs and takes a shower. When he comes down, I asked him why he had to take a shower at that moment. His simply answer, because I was sweating so much. "Why were you sweating" "because I got this math problem and it's very hard" " Want me to try and help you with it" "Yes, grandpa" he replied. Problem is a train is going from south to north traveling 60 mph. At a certain point a train travelling from north to south traveling 60 mph ........how fast were they going when they met? Sounds like the question was going to be , what's the engineers name??. Anyway, why all the calculating? Well grandpa, this is the NEW MATH, my teacher tells me that to start I have to draw a tangent from one train in comparison to the other train, at which point I have to calculate the square root of the length of the trains and find the PI, then fine the acute angle and split it in half to form two equal angles, I don't understand why I have to draw a tangent...........WHAAAAT?????????? WHY CAN'T YOU JUST SAY each independent train was going 60mph when they past each other? or an overall speed of both train 120 mph. You may ask now, what's this got to due with the budget of the country?......... IT'S THE NEW MATH!!!!!! ............Lets go back to old math and we will then be able to balance the budget..........This was the point,..... I had to leave and take a shower.

EXAMPLE

When my father came home from work on Friday night, he had $36.00 after taxes to spend. He would take out of a steel box containing 10 envelopes, each marked with a word.

EXAMPLE

mortgage/rent, food, clothes, gas and electric, gas for car, vacation , medical, insurances, savings and incidentals. Into each of these envelopes he would put that amount of money that he allotted for each item. ALWAYS REMEMBERING NOT TO EXCEED $36.00. Simply because you cannot spend something YOU DON'T HAVE!!!!!!

RESULT

If, If, and only IF you did not spend the allotted amount for a specific item, you could reduce that amount in the envelope by that much............for those of you that can't figure that out and for ALL OUR CONGRESS PEOPLE. If you budget $3.00 per week for Auto gas and you only SPENT $2.00 one week, you would have a SURPLUS of $1.00 in that envelope meaning you could replace $2.00 in the envelope the next week which brought you back to a balanced budget and place $1.00 extra into  the incidental envelope and can be spent on INCIDENTALS. THIS IS CALLED A BALANCED BUDGET. YOU SPEND AT THE SAME RATE AS YOU EARN!!!!!!!!!! NOW!! If you spent $4.00 on gas that week and had to borrow $1.00 from someone, this is referred to an UNBALANCED BUDGET until that $1.00 was paid back to that person....YOU HAVE SPENT MORE THAN YOU HAVE EARNED...... Now, WHERE and HOW do you get that $1.00 from. You could go and look for empty cans and sell them for $1.00 or you could go and borrow another $1.00 from someone else to pay back the first person or you could look in your incidental envelope for the $1 or STOP BUYING THINGS. If you do nothing THIS, my friends is called stupidity. The best way to do this is to sell something and get back into a balanced budget. If you continue to borrow more and more ..............YOUR SCREWED!!!!!!!! You are going to find this similar to the budget of the USA.

WE, the people of the United States of American, united as one people promise to give the government of said nation each week and from each paycheck monies to be known as taxes. This is the ONLY MONEY THE USA HAS AS INCOME, The USA does not produce, any other income (perhaps we should, but this would be unfair competition according to a few) based fair and square on the concept of THE MORE YOU MAKE, THE MORE YOU PAY TAX ON. REGARDLESS OF WHAT ANYBODY WHATS. If you want it then you buy it and if you want other people to use it, charge them a fee and pay tax on that fee. Don't expect the government to buy you all these things that they can not afford just to give WE THE PEOPLE and unbalanced budget. (to be continued in PART 2)

Congress says they are looking into this Bernard Madoff scandal. Oh, great!! The guy who made $50 billion disappear is being investigated by the people who made $1.3 trillion disappear!

THINK ABOUT IT.............PART 2

We left off at WE as a united people promise to pay taxes so that our government will be able to pay for things we can all use. We all know, that Congressman and women are sent to Congress to work on behalf of areas of a particular state and their constituents of that area, let's  use the phrase.........FOR THE PEOPLE.... We also know, that supposedly, it's the majority of the constituents of that area that  elected this person to that position. This simply means that that person coming to Congress is to follow the wishes of the majority of that particular area. With all these known factors, we all know that this particular person will do only what he/she personally feels is correct, who cares about........THE PEOPLE...... They may tell you something totally different and how they are fighting for you BUT in reality they are doing what THEY want.

EXAMPLE

Talagoosa state park comes to the Congressperson representing that area and request to have him try to get money to buy 100 picnic tables for the park. Now, even though the general public of that area have voted and have selected not to have tax money spent on 100 picnic tables, the Congressperson still goes and works out a deal that if he promises his vote for better national transportation he will get the 100 picnic tables. But, I'm from Timbuckto. what do I care if he wants 100 picnic tables for his park, what do I get? This is called PORK in the bill. Every bill has PORK. Bottom line, the government will pay for it from the intake from?..................TAXES..........correct. Because every Congressperson is selling their vote for something they want..............but.................the government pays for it. Now, the best part is beginning to take shape. One group of Congress persons keep saying, if WE, the people want all these things we have to pay for them and since the only way we get our money if from TAXES we have to raise the taxes from the WE, the people. On the other hand, the other group of people, knowing that WE, the people do not want to have their taxes raise, yells and yells to give the WE the people back their taxes. It belongs to them. This now transforms into the situation we are in today. SPENDING MORE THAN YOU ARE ABLE TO EARN!!!!!!!! So now we have the WE, the people screaming at the CEO of the USA to curb the budget but no one is willing to give up what they are about to get. The CEO tells the Congresspeople that all of their pay raises will stop for the next 5 years. NO! NO! NO! NOT THAT!!!!! stop the raises for the WE, the old people instead. We, the congresspeople work very hard 3 days a week, 26 weeks a year and we must go around the world to see how Americans are doing on government expense! BUT! says the CEO, we have people out of work that are not paying taxes, if you want the 100 picnic tables for your park, let them build them and the people of your area, that can enjoy them, will pay for them. NO! NO! We the Congresspeople will be seen as not doing our job then.

Does any of this sound familiar??

Now, a fact, the secretary of the budget is presently presenting a budget listing 2.5 trillion Dollars income and 3.8 trillion Dollars expenditure. My math tells me this creates an additional 1.3 trillion dollar shortfall. What does their math say??

Perhaps, the USA government should look into selling services to make money. If a country wishes to have US troops available in their country it will cost them, for example

1- Soldier, Sailor or Marine = $80 per day plus perdiem for food and housing

1 jeep $10.95 per day unlimited mileage not including fuel (must be returned full) insurance not included and must be paid by customer.

1 helicopter $14.95 per day unlimited flight hours not including fuel (must be returned full) insurance not included and must be paid by customer.

1 aircraft carrier $1000 per day unlimited sea travel not including fuel, crew,incidentals

1 irate crowd to yell obscenities at the locals $1000 per day maximum 15 members plus perdiem.

1 bottle of WMD (weapon of mass destruction or better known as Montezuma revenge water )bottled in Mexico $9.95

OTHER SERVICE FOR SALE

Hurricane, Volcano eruption, Earthquake assistance, Prices on Request.

All Federal Prisons Prices on Request.

Now, if the individual states are also interested in any of these as a business, they can either start their own company offering some service and then pay the US Government a Federal Excise tax or they can franchise this from the Federal Government and pay the franchise fee plus a small monthly fee based on their earnings.

MAYBE THEN WE CAN GET A BALANCED BUDGET. Dad, we need your envelope system really bad. Can you release the copyright???


SOUND CONFUSING?...............IT'S SUPPOSE TO!...............MAKE SENSE?...............HELL NO!
CAN ANYONE UNDERSTAND ANY OF THE ABOVE?...................NOT A BIT!
THEN PERHAPS YOU SHOULD RUN FOR CONGRESS!!!!!

I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Hotline. I got a call center in Pakistan , and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck

WAS I LONELY AS AN ONLY CHILD.....??

Me at 6 mo. old

Growing up as an only child, to some, might seem to be the ultimate of happiness, never having to share your clothes, car, girlfriend or toys with anyone. It was, at times, the ultimate and then other times it was just one pain in the butt, no one to play in the sandbox with, no one to tell your little secrets to, plus there was so much that you had to live up to.

I'm sure that in my parents first touch of me, they could feel the joy of what parenting was all about..... but.....I wonder what they thought when I reached 2 years old,.....13 years old.....21 years old and upward. I can only imagine, since now both parents are gone and I can't even confirm my thoughts.

OH WELL...perhaps if I could arrange a seance it would go like this!

In my moms' eyes that first touch brought tears of happiness to her. "Oh, my little boy, He will grow up to be a hunk, I know, I can feel it. He probably will be a doctor, invent penicillin and become world famous. Girls from around the world will adore him, but he will only be true to the feelings I will pass on to him.......... No! he will become President of the United States and Kings, Queens and other Presidents will search him out to advise them on world issues......He does need company though, a little sister would help so that he doesn't grow up alone."


Now, on my father first touch, it brought a totally different prospective.
"AH!...... my son, this little guy will carry on the family name. I got my son, nothing else matters. Time to tie a yellow ribbon round this old oak tree. This guy will be an athletic phenomenon, a golfer world renown he will be.... and have girls from around the world searching him out for his affection. NO! maybe a handsome world renowned sports agent earning millions off of other people. NAH! ....... OO!......... OO!....... I got it, a plumber who can charge extremely high hourly prices and double charges for after hours, week-ends and holidays....... A sister.........give me a break.........never happen."

Well, it turned out that none of the above applied, but growing up, learning and experiencing life has been a total joy. No matter where I've been, what I've done, both my parents always seemed proud of me.

At 2 years old, the terrible twosome years. I can only visualize that my mom would dress me up in my little white suit with short pants and take me for a walk around the neighborhood to show me off to her lady friends and their little girls, looking for someone she thought would be compatible to have my name Mrs.Doctor R.... or Mrs. First Lady R........
She would brag how neat and well groomed a person I am, how polite and sophisticated I was for my young age......, and he will only get better with age. How well adjusted I was. " What kind of dowry does your little girl have? 3 sheep, 2 goats and a partridge in a pear tree?? ...........................any money attached to that?"

My dad on the other hand wanted me to wear golfing knickers.....(no way in hell).... and carry a nine iron over my shoulder or a putter under my arm, or maybe a wrench in the back pocket of my plumbers pants that hung down to just above the crack in my beautifully shaped butt. Now the truth of the matter is, I was a spoiled brat and would scream and yell if I didn't get what I wanted, until my dad would take my hand and squeeze it like hell, welding my fingers together. The big guy, taught this trick to my mom and so no more screamin' and yellin' after 2 1/2.

Thirteen found new life in me. I was growing up now. Started to look at life through another side of the spectrum. Guess the Gemini was starting to show or perhaps this is the beginning of my adult life. Noticed my voice was becoming deeper. I was always under the impression that 18years old was that point. I guess it was about 2 years prior, that I came out of elementary school into Junior High. This was something totally new. Not only did my friends from Franklin elementary come along but I also met new people from Hewlett, elementary and Woodmere elementary. Making new friends was not very difficult for me but now I found other interesting things. Sports became a big part of my life, even though I was just a mediocre player compared to some of the other players coming out of the other schools.

We didn't have organized sports as they do today, no T-Ball, no little league, just sandlot. Choose up sides, pick me type of sports. I never got picked first but as time went by you could almost bet I would be picked 2nd or 3rd.
I found more interest in more diverse things and that intrigued me. Leading into High school I was now an established part of a specific group and that grew as time went by. Those were truly happy days. My mom and dad always enjoyed when kids were over at our house. I can remember my mom, occasionally on a Friday night after basketball games, baking pizza for the gang at my house. It was like a mini pizza shop, the swinging door between the kitchen and the dining room would swing open and another pizza would show up. My house, became a hub of sort.
LONELINESS, then and now was and is ...............just a word...............the past filled with such great memories and the future with such great anticipation. Real friendships truly last a lifetime.
High School was now over, I did not get my fully paid scholarship to Princeton or as a matter of fact any other school of my choice, as if my parents could even afford it if I did but I had a car and I had a dream. My parents, over the years, probably realized that I would not be a doctor or President so they started to prepare me for life in another way.......they bought me a wrench!! The big clue came, when my chemistry teacher requested a meeting with my mother. At this summit, he sort of insisted that she encourage me NOT to continue in this class, that there just was not a budget for a destroyed chemistry lab. President? of what? ..........the United States......our United States?? Have you possibly though about him being a plumber??

They instilled upon me, that I should always treat people as I wanted people to treat me, along with the idea that knowledge is not necessarily what one knows but what one wants to know. You can always find the answers to questions somewhere. Guess that was the reason for the set of encyclopedias that my parents gave me during my sophomore year. Funny thing, I still have that set.....but now.....I truly know everything. The little I don't know I can always Google.

It's amazing how things, now a days are just basically replicas of days gone by. I had a typewriter and a set of encyclopedias. While I typed I could look up information. Now I have a word processor and Google. I can do the same thing.......... Erase it, no problem, now I can simply backspace and delete, back then backspace and white out paper was used. In the old days, some would have a portable typewriter to carry around. Now, you can carry your laptop. Back then, you had party-line telephones, now we have conference calling. OH ! how we marvel over present day technology, Today it's facebook or twitter, yesteryear it was a nosey neighbor. Things just move faster now.

          ..........bottomline.............lonliness is only a word.

MOVING MOMENTS REMEMBERED

During the course of the just under 40 years, I spent with SAS, I can say that I met people from all walks of life. From the little drunken Norwegian seaman or the Polish immigrant to movie stars, athletes, heads of state, royalty, you name it. One person remains vividly in my memory. I was invited to a party at a friends home one evening and was introduced to Jack. He, also was in the airline business but was a Captain. We started talking and he was one of, if not the funniest person I have ever met. As we talked, more and more guests were beginning to come over to where we were to listen to some of his stories, which I found out from someone, were actually true stories about him. I want to pass a few on to you in this post and hope you enjoy them as much as I have.

Jack was piloting an Aircraft from San Francisco one nice day. The hostess from first class came into the flight deck just as they were closing the doors and asked if she could bring this lady into the flight deck to visit, explaining that this was the ladies first time flying. After getting Jacks approval, the hostess delivers her passenger " to the jaws of jokesville"

Jack welcomed the lady and introduced her to the first officer. Jack assured the lady that she was about to experience flying with only her in mind and that the aircraft had the latest of safety equipment on board and that the experience of the first officer and himself was more than 50 years. Jack told the lady that at any time during the flight she wished to come back up to visit it was no problem. Flying was compared to sitting in your living room with a nice glass of wine. Now.............as the story goes........Jack also added the fact that every pilot was a specialty pilot and very proficient, his specialty was "TAKE OFF PILOT" and that his first officer was a "LANDING PILOT" a few seconds past by when the first officer, leaned over and told Jack that HE WAS THE TAKE OFF PILOT, and has never landed an airplane, except in training. Now, the ladies eyes were like half dollars listening to these two guys surprisingly both TAKE OFF PILOTS blaming crew scheduling for such a mix up. How could they screw up like this BUT it to late to change things now. We'll just have to go with it and get it straightened out later. They both could see the anguish in the ladies eyes listening to this but still wanting to put her trust into their abilities. They had to call in the HOSTESS to put this lady at ease and that they were only joking. Just to prove it, the hostess said to the lady, "and I guess they told you it was sitting in your living room with a nice glass of wine. It was at that point..........the lady stop climbing the walls of the flight deck. As the hostess was pulling her down, she said to the lady..........." instead of that glass of wine, I'll bring to 2 scotch on the rocks"

On another flight from Chicago to Seattle, Jack and his total crew arrived at the airport. Jack and the other pilot went into the breifing room while some of the cabin attendants went to have a cup of coffee. While having coffee, they saw their aircraft pulling into its assigned gate, hurridly finished their coffee, grabbed their suitcases and proceeded to the gate. After the passenger were boarded and the doors were being closed a hostess entered the flightdeck with a panic look on her face. She told Jack, that in the rush to get to the aircraft, she accidently left her purse handing on the chair in the restaurant with all her I.D's money etc...................meanwhile and unbeknown to her, a restaurant employee had found her bag, rushed it over to the airline counter and turned it in. The purse was immediatly sent down to the ramp area at which point it was taped to a very long pole and passed up the the flight deck through the pilots window...........SSSOOOOO Jack not only knew about this but also had her purse. " should I just give her back her purse or should I have some fun and teach her a lesson" Needless to say Jack simply turned to the paniced girl and said "we're about to start engines and I can't hold that up. When we begin taxiing, I will just call back to dispatch, have them get your purse and they can FAX it to Seattle. A bit of a queried look now blanketed the hostesses face but she put her confidence into Jack. " Can they really do that" "Of course, with the new technology they can do just about anything. Four hours later, they landed in Seattle, Jack taxis his way to the gate informing the ground staff that he has this purse for one of the hostesses and that he will drop it out the window. Just have the ramp guy catch it and run up the stairs and hand it to the hostess when she opens the door. Well done Capt Jack!!!! Instructions noted the ramper is standing by the door and as soon as the door opens, he follows the plan. " I have a purse here for a hostess that left it in the coffee shop in Chicago and they FAXED it over to us. THANK YOU, THANK YOU ......SO MUCH as she starts to go through the purse to see if everything is in place. Noting nothing missing she opened the flightdeck door and says with a happy grin

"OH Capt, thank you so much for your help, my purse was just given to me ..................and everything is in tact"..................the wonders of the new electronic age